Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Golf courses make people crazy


Tiger Woods has been a bad boy. He has been cheating on his wife with a floozy. Everyone knows it. It is on Wikipedia.

Look at this picture of Tiger going crazy. He is a very angry and unhappy rich, old, white man. He sees a cute frog and is going to try to kill it with his hat. STOP IT TIGER!! He is also angry because he doesn't believe Sharp Park is historical and is unhappy that some people don't want to turn it into a National Park. He is going crazy because he is exposed to golf course herbicides and pesticides have affected his brain and made him insane. All golfers are scary and insane. It is scary. Tiger is hot under the collar because of global warming. If there was no global warming, Tiger would be chilling.

This is why we need to turn Sharp Park Golf Course into a National Park. I have decided we will call it Brent Plater National Park. I like that name. It makes me happy.

Don't let scary and rich, old white guys like Tiger spend time on golf courses anymore. It makes them crazy. If you golf, it will make you crazy, too.



Submitted by: Winter Roads

<< That's me!! See why Brent Plater has the hots for me!! Brent and I make each other happy. I hope Mrs. Brent doesn't have any golf clubs to smash the back window of his Prius when she finds out about me and Brenty-poo.

John Curtis wants me, but he can't have me. He only takes me to McDonalds on dates. He makes me pay, and then he steals all my cheeseburgers. Ick.

3 comments:

Mrs. Brent Plater said...

Stop picking on Tiger! Everyone knows the White Tiger is endangered. It's on Wikipedia and also on the Endangered Species List. The endangered White Tiger is also the most beautiful serpent, strike that, mammal on the planet. And, Mrs. Tiger, listen up: You don't go after an endangered species with a 7 iron! That's a NO NO! And you cannot invade an endangered species' habitat either. The Cadillac Escalade is the protected habitat of the endangered White Tiger. Everyone knows this. It's in Wikipedia and in the Recovery Guide for the Endangered White Tiger. You don't attack the protected habitat of the endangered White Tiger with a 7 iron!

Jeffrey W Simons said...

Everyone knows you get a sharper angle and do more damage with a pitching wedge.

The Ghost of Bobby Jones said...

My caddy normally recommends a mashie in this situation. I don't know if it's the right club selection, but something about it sure sounds right...